On Dog Ownership

Disability and Determination is a weekly newsletter about my experience navigating life with a rare disability. If you like this post, feel free to give a click on the ❤️ symbol below. This will help me get discovered by others on Substack. To be notified of future posts, drop your email in the field at the bottom and click the Subscribe button. If you’d like to further contribute, I also offer a paid subscription option (that includes extra monthly content), or you can Buy Me a Coffee ☕ I’m glad you’re here ☺️

It’s official…I’ve become one of those dog owners who can do almost nothing except talk about their dog (or post pictures of them on their Instagram). I love him so, so much, and he’s really the best dog. It’s not hard to want to talk about him all the time.

It has not always been a walk in the park though (pun intended?). In the beginning, I had many moments (sometimes days) where I didn’t think I was cut out for this and wanted to give him back. I mentioned I like to quit hard things, right? In all seriousness though, it was a really difficult adjustment. In the end, I just needed to give it time. My poor dog had been uprooted multiple times. Just like humans, it takes time to adjust to a new place and to new people. We had a totally different routine than his foster parents had before us too.

Instead of rambling on for paragraphs, I thought I would do a nice little outline of the challenges and joys of dog ownership (some related to my disability, and some not).

Challenges

• The adjustment period - I did a lot of research before I got a dog but admittedly, I had no clue about the adjustment period. My friend sent me this handy chart that shows how long it can take a rescue dog to really acclimate to their new home.

  

  Rogy got into his groove pretty quickly, but the first week-two weeks were rough. I was trying to train him to do things like get on my bed and then he would bark at me. He was waking me up way too early. He had zero interest in me and only wanted to be near my dad. I thought he was scared of me because of my disability or my limp (totally not true, he doesn’t even flinch when I take him somewhere with my walker).

• Sleep Deprivation - I was not a morning person before this. I could get up for work, but on the weekends, I’d get up around 9 or 10. One of the reasons I wanted a pug was because they’re known for being lazy and sleeping late. Not my pug, however. To this day, he can still get up at 5 or 5:30 sometimes and I have to tell him to go back to bed (which he always does). When I’m on my own with him and my parents aren’t home, he tends to sleep a little later too because he’s not getting up when they do. I had a really hard time adjusting to getting up so much earlier. When you share your bed with a dog too, they often get up, switch positions, or in the case of pugs—snore. So I don’t often get a full night of uninterrupted sleep anymore. Sleep for me has always been more than just a part of life. It’s often a necessity because of my disability, so I’ve just had to pivot. I go to bed earlier and take naps when I can to make sure my body and mind are still getting enough rest. I actually kind of enjoy being a morning person now, especially in the heat of summer when it gets hot so fast. I’ve actually gone to Trader Joe’s right when they open for the first time in my life 😂

• Potty training - My plan had been to get a dog that was potty trained. Rogy was technically potty trained because he would go on his walks and not in the house (though there have been some pee accidents, for sure), but we had a really hard time getting him to go in the backyard. He just wouldn’t do it. He’d look at us and lie down on the patio and never go. After him being here for about 2 months, he finally started to get the hang of it and he goes outside no problem.

• The weather - Though he’s getting better at going outside, the weather has other plans. I live in an area that gets well over 100 degrees most of the summer. Pugs can’t be outside in anything hotter than 75 degrees. It’s too hot after about 10am this time of year—for him to walk on the concrete, but also because he can overheat really easily being a flat-nosed breed. Originally we had him wearing his doggie bellybands (picture diapers that don’t go over your butt), but those caused his skin to get so itchy and irritated we had to stop using them. Thankfully he pees so much on his walk that he’s ok until it’s time to take him out again in the evening.

• Living in a 2 story house - When we bought this house, I was in much better physical condition, so the stairs weren’t a big deal. At this stage of my life, and with a dog, it’s much harder. With my parents here, we have it figured out, but if they go out of town, I have to figure out how to manage letting him out. I can’t be going up and down the stairs multiple times a day, so that’s been a big challenge. I really need to start looking into those chairs that take you up and down the stairs.

• The physicality - Even with my parents’ help, owning a dog is still very physically demanding. I get up and down way more with letting him out and taking care of his daily routine things. With working from home, that’s a blessing in a lot of ways because pre-Rogy, I would just sit at my desk for hours and not get up. So I’m actually getting more exercise which is good. But I’ve definitely had to figure out how to pace myself more so I can make sure I can take care of him but also not push myself too far and risk falling. My dad is a huge help with everything too.

• The cost - I knew a dog was going to cost a lot beforehand, so I made sure I was in a stable enough financial situation before I even started down the adoption path. But just to give you an idea, to get his teeth cleaned (something you have to have done once a year) was over $1000. If he had needed any extractions, it would be have been many hundreds more over that. And before the actual cleaning, it was another $300 for lab work. So when you throw in food, vaccines, grooming (which thankfully I can do at home with my dad’s help), and all the other miscellaneous things you need to buy on top of vet visits…it adds up real quick.

• Travel/vacations - Traveling and vacations are kind of out for now. This isn’t true for every dog, but it is for mine for the most part. He doesn’t love being in the car so long road trips are tough (though he does have anxiety meds for those kinds of situations). Pugs are very clingy too and often have separation anxiety which my dog definitely does. Leaving him for long periods of time just isn’t an option. I still haven’t left him alone even to do a quick errand yet. I’m not quite sure how he would do at a doggy hotel or something like that either, but we’ll see what happens in the future. Definitely no overseas adventures for me anytime soon which is ok, because I can’t really do that with COVID anymore anyway. I definitely thought about all of that ahead of time too.

• The work - In case all of the aforementioned bullets didn’t prove this…having a dog is a lot of work.

Joys

• Cuddle time - It took Rogy a while to warm up to me. He liked my dad way better for a while. But once he realized he was safe and that I was the one who took care of him (including being the one who feeds him), he became such a cuddle pug. He’s the Velcro Pug I always wanted now. When he cuddles up on me in bed or on the couch, I absolutely melt (see header photo). There is no feeling in the world like it.

• The laughter - I’m sure this is true of dogs in general, but Rogy makes me crack up every day. He has the best personality and makes the best facial expressions.

• Life motivation - Before Rogy, I was not a person who really looked forward to waking up the next day. Even on my good anxiety/depression days, I’ve just never been one of those people who wakes up thinking “woo hoo, it’s another day! Let’s go!”. I wouldn’t wake up dreading the day in most cases, but I just never had that joyful feeling in the morning that a lot of people seem to. Rogy makes me excited to get up. Both because he’s so excited to see me but I’m also just as excited to see him and get to spend the day with him.

• The focus shift - It’s no secret that thing suck right now in the States…real hard. It’s overwhelming and completely demoralizing. Rogy has helped shift my perspective so much. Taking care of him takes up a lot of my time and energy so I don’t have as much time to dwell on the horrible things happening. I can stay informed and participate in activism the best I can, but I know without Rogy, I would probably be in a really bad depression right now, and not as easily able to function. He makes all the bad stuff even in my own personal life, not feel so bad.

• The training - Rogy didn’t need a whole lot of training, but in addition to potty training, there was some. There’s nothing like putting all the work in and then seeing your dog do the thing you trained them to or when they listen. Seeing him pick up the bathroom in the backyard thing has been so rewarding. He actual came from a Spanish-speaking household too so I get to practice some of my Spanish with him when I give him commands and call him over.

• The cost - You’re probably thinking wait, how can this be a joy and a challenge? I’m glad you asked. The cost sucks, yes. I know I’m fortunate to swing it right now. What having to spend more on a dog did though was force me to really look at where I was spending my money and cut back. Do I really need like 12 streaming services? No…especially not now when I have way less time to watch TV to begin with. I no longer buy crap for myself that I don’t need anymore either. Plus, before I got Rogy, I had to make room for him which allowed me to get rid of a lot of stuff and look at my shopping habit. Turns out, I don’t need 4 of everything 😂

• The community - Even though there are no dog meetups in my immediate area, owning a dog automatically puts you in a community—a pug especially. I get to bring Rogy to meet other friends’ dogs (he’s so good with other dogs and people). Even just on Instagram, I’ve met so many other awesome pug owners. I still have to pinch myself sometimes that I’m a pug mom…something I’ve wanted for such a long time.

• Having someone happy to see you - Always. I can leave the room for a few minutes and my dog is ecstatic to see me when I come back. If I’m gone—even for a quick errand—it’s like I was gone for years. Dogs give you this unconditional love that is just unmatched. I can’t even put the feeling adequately into words when I look down and my little guy is next to me, looking up at me, as he follows me around the house.

• It helps you slow down - It did for me anyway. I’m very much a to-do list person. I love a list, and I love checking things off of lists, but the flip side of that is that sometimes I’m constantly going-going-going trying to get things done (to the point I push myself too far physically). My dog allows me to stop and smell the roses (sometimes he literally stops and smells the roses). I see him sitting there on the couch, my bed, etc. and whatever I’m doing no longer seems so important. I’ve spent an hour on the couch doing nothing with him sleeping on my lap. I try not to think about it too much, but Rogy is 5 and most pugs only live about 10-12 years, so every moment I have with him is precious.

Having a dog is definitely a lot. It’s a lot of work, it’s a lot of money, it’s a lot of time. Your life, your routine as you knew it, goes right out the window. But you find a new routine. You find a new normal, and let me tell you, that new normal is pretty awesome. I’m so glad I didn’t give up on the little guy. He’s one of the best examples I’ve ever had of things not working out the way you think, but being exactly what you need. On paper, he didn’t have a lot of the qualities I had originally wanted in a pug. Yet, he ended up being the perfect dog for me, and just what I needed.