Disability and Determination is a weekly newsletter about my experience living with a rare disability…with a little bit of meditation, pop culture, and other random things thrown in.
He'll always be the 13 Things kid to me. LOL. I'm so glad the OT and PT are helping, Jackie. I'm sorry the rest of it is a pain in the arse. The next time you see Dr. Asshat, just say, "I'd really like to have a good and trusting rapport with you. In order for that to happen, I need to you hear me." And if he's staggered by that, just add, "If it helps, pretend I'm a man, that a man is telling you these symptoms and concerns." I used to have to say that* to the mechanics I dealt with. Yes, Roy, you *do* have to jump the starter. (*What I actually said was a little ruder, but it got the point across.) xo
This is what happens when I don’t reply to comments right away. Totally lose track 😂 He’s totally forever the 13 Reasons Why kid (even though I only watched the first two seasons).
I’m still on the fence if I want to see this doctor again but I did send him a message with some of my old medical records after the appointment to put him in his place. He sent a snarky message back to that too 😂 But I felt better having done it after he acted like I was crazy about asking about something that he’s supposed to know comes with having muscular dystrophy. If I do go back, really appreciate that verbiage to use since my post-processor brain has a hard time coming up with stuff in those situations (besides a hearty “fuck you” anyway lol). I also wish I knew everything about cars there is to know so I could put mechanics in their place too!
Oh, I don't know much about cars, but when I called AAA to start my car, he told me is wasn't the battery, tried jumping the starter and that worked. When I happened again, I called AAA and told them to jump the starter; worked again. When it happened after getting gas at a Chevron station with a repair shop, I asked him to please jump my starter and...
Contact Kaiser about this. They are very into patient satisfaction. At least they are here (behind the Orange Curtain, it might be different 😉). Let them know your feelings/experience and let them know his response. He might get some further training. Now, all my doctors want to chat and know my feelings/concerns/etc. As a GenXer, I'm not used to that. LOL. And, at the end of the day, "fuck you" works just fine. In the meantime, look into other doctors offered, and see if you find one you connect with. You might end up in the hands of the next great expert. xo
I unfortunately contacted Kaiser Member Services once already about trying to find a doc with experience dealing with patients with disabilities when I was having issues with my former PCP and they took that as I wanted to file a complaint against him. He was an asshole but I hadn't decided at that point if I wanted to file a complaint, so didn't appreciate them just doing it. That caused a whole chain of events I didnt want and they talked to the office where my current PCP works and I definitely didnt want them to do that since it didn't involve her at all. Then when I tried to reach out to the person who was assigned to my case, she never called me back after several attempts. So I'm kind of exhausted from having to deal with any level of Kaiser and don't want to have to file an actual complaint this time. I am going to see if I can find a better neurologist next time, even if they're not the "neuromuscular specialist" this guy was supposed to be. If I'd known how much worse Kaiser was out here, definitely would have rethought moving. At least my physical therapist and gyno are good 😂
Jackie, I’m not sure where you are in the world, but I have a very lovely and smart neuromuscular specialist who is based in NYC if that’s at all helpful. Though I’m thinking you’re probably not based in NY. In any event, I’m sorry that you were mansplained to by this new doc. It’s so disappointing and frustrating.
Brats is on my list! Probably up next as I just finished the latest season of Bridgerton and I’m awaiting the next season of The Bear next week.
Unfortunately I'm on the opposite coast, but appreciate your recommendation so much! I'm in an area that has limited options for healthcare too so even if I switch, there's a large chance it won't be better. Very frustrating for sure.
I totally missed the memo that The Bear was coming back next week so thanks for making my week on that one! That's one of my all time favorite shows. I just finished the latest season of Bridgerton too. Sure do love that one too.
I knew it! I knew that lead singer looked familiar. I never watched that series, but I remember seeing him on another show I used to watch called "Saving Grace." I've said it before but healthcare in the US sucks great big hairy donkeyballs. My BFF went through this too in her neck of the woods until she finally found a good doctor. She was having pelvic floor issues that were causing a whole host of body problems for her.
He'll always be the 13 Things kid to me. LOL. I'm so glad the OT and PT are helping, Jackie. I'm sorry the rest of it is a pain in the arse. The next time you see Dr. Asshat, just say, "I'd really like to have a good and trusting rapport with you. In order for that to happen, I need to you hear me." And if he's staggered by that, just add, "If it helps, pretend I'm a man, that a man is telling you these symptoms and concerns." I used to have to say that* to the mechanics I dealt with. Yes, Roy, you *do* have to jump the starter. (*What I actually said was a little ruder, but it got the point across.) xo
This is what happens when I don’t reply to comments right away. Totally lose track 😂 He’s totally forever the 13 Reasons Why kid (even though I only watched the first two seasons).
I’m still on the fence if I want to see this doctor again but I did send him a message with some of my old medical records after the appointment to put him in his place. He sent a snarky message back to that too 😂 But I felt better having done it after he acted like I was crazy about asking about something that he’s supposed to know comes with having muscular dystrophy. If I do go back, really appreciate that verbiage to use since my post-processor brain has a hard time coming up with stuff in those situations (besides a hearty “fuck you” anyway lol). I also wish I knew everything about cars there is to know so I could put mechanics in their place too!
Oh, I don't know much about cars, but when I called AAA to start my car, he told me is wasn't the battery, tried jumping the starter and that worked. When I happened again, I called AAA and told them to jump the starter; worked again. When it happened after getting gas at a Chevron station with a repair shop, I asked him to please jump my starter and...
Contact Kaiser about this. They are very into patient satisfaction. At least they are here (behind the Orange Curtain, it might be different 😉). Let them know your feelings/experience and let them know his response. He might get some further training. Now, all my doctors want to chat and know my feelings/concerns/etc. As a GenXer, I'm not used to that. LOL. And, at the end of the day, "fuck you" works just fine. In the meantime, look into other doctors offered, and see if you find one you connect with. You might end up in the hands of the next great expert. xo
I unfortunately contacted Kaiser Member Services once already about trying to find a doc with experience dealing with patients with disabilities when I was having issues with my former PCP and they took that as I wanted to file a complaint against him. He was an asshole but I hadn't decided at that point if I wanted to file a complaint, so didn't appreciate them just doing it. That caused a whole chain of events I didnt want and they talked to the office where my current PCP works and I definitely didnt want them to do that since it didn't involve her at all. Then when I tried to reach out to the person who was assigned to my case, she never called me back after several attempts. So I'm kind of exhausted from having to deal with any level of Kaiser and don't want to have to file an actual complaint this time. I am going to see if I can find a better neurologist next time, even if they're not the "neuromuscular specialist" this guy was supposed to be. If I'd known how much worse Kaiser was out here, definitely would have rethought moving. At least my physical therapist and gyno are good 😂
At least there's that. So sorry, doll. Hope the right person comes to you. xo
Jackie, I’m not sure where you are in the world, but I have a very lovely and smart neuromuscular specialist who is based in NYC if that’s at all helpful. Though I’m thinking you’re probably not based in NY. In any event, I’m sorry that you were mansplained to by this new doc. It’s so disappointing and frustrating.
Brats is on my list! Probably up next as I just finished the latest season of Bridgerton and I’m awaiting the next season of The Bear next week.
Unfortunately I'm on the opposite coast, but appreciate your recommendation so much! I'm in an area that has limited options for healthcare too so even if I switch, there's a large chance it won't be better. Very frustrating for sure.
I totally missed the memo that The Bear was coming back next week so thanks for making my week on that one! That's one of my all time favorite shows. I just finished the latest season of Bridgerton too. Sure do love that one too.
I knew it! I knew that lead singer looked familiar. I never watched that series, but I remember seeing him on another show I used to watch called "Saving Grace." I've said it before but healthcare in the US sucks great big hairy donkeyballs. My BFF went through this too in her neck of the woods until she finally found a good doctor. She was having pelvic floor issues that were causing a whole host of body problems for her.